Beef jerkey.

There used to be this infomercial about a food dehydrator. They went on and on about the virtues of their miracle machine. They asked "How much a year do you spend on beef jerkey alone?".
At that time, the answer was "Not a fucking penny you moron."

Now however, I have calculated it, and I spend about two-hundred dollars a year on jerkey alone. There is something terribly wrong with that. I find myself craving jerkey in the middle of the night, in the morning, hell, all the time. I like spicey jerkey, and teryaki jerkey. I like buffalo jerkey too, but only occasionally.
The best jerkey I have had is this homemade stuff I get at the local apple orchard here. It's spicy, and sweet, and not too tough on the teeth. It's like the blue ribbon fucking jerkey.

Why Joe? Why a post about beef jerkey?

Beacause I ran out yesterday, and forgot to pick more up.