Tuesday, October 26, 2004

My ever expanding staff here at the soapbox!

We here at Littlejoe's soapbox strive to bring you the very best in skewed news coverage, op eds, and human interest stories. In our quest to bring to you the very best and latest news, I, and Corkscrew the Conservative Cat have been searching for more staff members to help with the fabricatio....err...reporting of stories.

We had almost given up hope, when we ran into Harley (or the cat formerly known as Tiny) a few weeks ago. Harley is a featherweight at just 2 pounds, but don't let that fool you! She is a vicious killer of all manner of small insects, fingers, and toes. Also, don't let her age fool you either, even at just 13 weeks old, she is very politically savvy, and closely follows the newswires, and current events, in the hopes of getting a scoop.

We were happy aquiring such a great new addition to the staff here, but we knew we needed more help. So we hunted, and looked around, and found another worthy contributor named Thor. Thor is our oldest staff member besides Littlejoe himself, and at four or five years he is considerably older than our other staffers. Thor is a bone thin (but ever growing!) German Shepard we hired from the local pound. While not as savvy as either of the cats on staff, he brings a certain calmness to things around the Soapbox.

What are their salaries? Someone asked me, well, I pay Harley in doggie treats (don't ask), and Thor works mostly for praise, and fake jerky treats. (A dog after my own heart...jerky...drooool) And of course everyone knows Corkscrew gets paid in canned salmon.

Being so busy with our recruitment, we haven't had alot of time to post anything for a while, well that should be changing here pretty soon.

Please help me in welcoming our tow new staffers, and send along any unwanted salmon...or doggie treats...or jerky.



At 26/10/04 9:09 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Congrats on the ever growing number of staffers. I am sure they will all have the same single minded tenacity that has made you the credible newsman we have all come to love and respect over the years.
Can't wait to meet them and hope they like Anime.

At 26/10/04 8:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Excellent staff selection on Thor! I look forward to meeting him sometime. Glad your back, and hope to hear more "scoops" from the soapbox soon!


At 27/10/04 11:10 AM, Blogger Anathematized1 said...

After having met your newest staff member I am under the impression he is a very deep thinker who will surprise you with his rare insight and creativity which comes from the plight of the philosopher.

Either that, or he did WAY too much drugs at the last rave at the pound.


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